Geek Gorgeous.......................................

If you have to ask, then it would appear that you are, indeed, a geek.

That being the case, what follows probably won’t be completely satisfactory as an answer. Yes, attraction is ruled by complex neurological reactions and subconscious, split-second calculations, all stuff that you alone are able to comprehend. But at the end of the day, to the extent that you’re thinking at all when you ogle an attractive female, you’re thinking exactly like most of the male population. That is to say, like a caveman.

It all boils down to evolutionary psychology and mate choice. Researchers–and why shouldn’t you be drawing a paycheck as one of these hot-shot researchers, it’s doubtful the windbags are anywhere near as smart as you–have isolated quite a few female physical attributes that are considered universally attractive. Some can even be expressed, wait on it, numerically! Research tells us that the most attractive female faces have eyes that are spaced at 46 of the width of the face, at a distance from the lips equal to 36 of the length of the face. There’s also the Waist-Hip Ratio, or WHR, with values from 0.7 to 0.9 rating pretty hot. And don’t even get started on our favorite places to see some well-rounded adipose fat. Evolutionary psychologists claim the reason these attibutes attract is that they point to the fertility potential in a prospective mate.

So your proposed pick-up line, “Would you possibly consider bearing my children?” wasn’t all that far off the mark. Clumsy and ineffective, yes, but off the mark, no.

Which puts you back in the pack with the other cavemen, drooling over these women. Strangely, there is a brotherhood here that you never experienced on the sports court or at the school dance. Among goddesses, every guy is a geek.